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LiveJournal for Haley.

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Sunday, March 7th, 2004

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Subject:for shitz and giggles
Time:5:44 pm.
Mood: discontent.
guess who it is? i thought id update for the lack of something better to do. also cause i need to talk but i dont want to...does that make sense? im not happy today...nope, not happy. i feel warn out and like crying. im home alone so its lonely but peaceful. i miss my car :( it kinda died last week and i dont know when im getting it back. see if i had it i could just leave and go hang out with someone but instead i have a busted-ass ride thats not going anywhere on three cylinders. somethin happened today at work that just kinda shocked me...it was really eerie. i work at an old folks home (assisted living) and i was walking into the lobby headed towards the hallway kitchen enterance to get some lunch when the elevator doors opened and out came two people pushing a stretcher. well at first glance it looked like it was empty..and keep in mind that at an assisted living hospital type atmoshpere, it is not unusual to see an old person being carried out on a stretcher, you know, normally its because they fell or something and they just need to be checked out and then they return back..but anyway when i stopped because they were heading through the same door i was going to, i noticed that the stretcher wasnt empty but ontop of it lay a big blue bag...a big blue body bag with someone in it. yeah, they just pushed it thought the lobby and out the back door. one of the residents sitting in the lobby (cause they all like to congegate there) asked me with a concerned look on her face "what were they pushing? it looked like a body but it was all covered up." i just replied " im not sure what it was, i dont know the whole story so im not sure" i knew damn well what it was but since it had just happened i didnt want to start anything between all the residents who were sitting in the lobby. man it was so creepy and kinda sad. i hadnt seen a dead body yet since i began working there. anyway, it just freaked me out a bit.

Friday, November 21st, 2003


Time:5:10 pm.
beneath low flying planes are playing tomarrow at the melb. jay cees. show starts at 7pm.

Monday, November 3rd, 2003

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Subject:dear austin,
Time:9:34 pm.
hey, this has been bothering me. i want to appologize for being a bitch lately. i will have the shirt money this weekend. yes, i do like practicing, and yes, i do like the new songs. i want to take you and slinky out for sushi sometime soon ok :)

Monday, July 14th, 2003

Subject:i hate..
Time:10:21 pm.
so tired. so tired of thinking the way i do. tired of trying to understand, trying to make sense. worrying. tired of crying at night. wish that some understanding could come from this, but i cant speak the words clearly enough. i cant vocalize the jumble that lives within my mind...that swims around daily causing me these questions that...just make me too tired to think. so many things that need fixing and i dont know how. im just making a fool out of myself.

Saturday, June 14th, 2003

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Time:2:36 pm.


Subject:and im so sad
Time:2:21 pm.
Mood: restless.
like a good book i cant put this day back, a sorta fairytale with you.

Thursday, June 5th, 2003

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Subject:how do you like my darkness now?
Time:6:45 pm.
Mood: hopeful.
today wasnt so bad. orientation went well, and the people i will be working with for the most part seem cool. there is this one chick there, amanda, she is a total goofball, i think she'll keep the job interesting enough. i had remnants of deception practice today also in which i just returned from. i have to go back to hibiscus court AGAIN tomarrow for my TB results and to watch a short film that i missed today. woo! but after that i have remnants practice again so its all good. i hope i dont start work till next week.

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Subject:oh yay for today
Time:9:12 am.
Mood: nervous.
i have orientation today in about an hour. im a lil nervous. i wasnt nervouse about this job until somehing happened yesturday that upset me. kinda sux because like i said before this job didnt seem like a burdon to me. now im worrried about how it is going to turn out and all i keep thinking towards is the worst. i shouldnt be worried, i should continue on like i had originally planed....but how would you feel if someone you thought you knew, someone who you thought was your friend stabbed you in the back? anyway, it changed my veiw on this job...i once thought it would be cool to be working with someone who i had already considered a friend.

Wednesday, June 4th, 2003

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Time:11:56 pm.
i want to make you feel this, trusting arms let me fall once again, i stood close to an enemy and closer to a friend.

Wednesday, May 21st, 2003


Time:5:13 pm.
Where is my kitten pic theresa!???

Thursday, May 15th, 2003

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Time:6:48 pm.
Austin Abbott, Theresa Heen, Kat Campbell, and Kira Youhas...
you are my best friends and i love you more than myself.

Monday, May 12th, 2003

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Time:5:48 pm.
pats down, its good to see him. he, my sister and i played pool last night at the bowling alley. ive been playing pool a lot lately and we've actually become such regulars that the kid behind the desk didnt charge us. that was pretty cool. im in a new band, Remnants of Deception, again, with one of my best friends. i enjoy it cause i get to do something new. im still playing drums but i get to scream too. thats right, haley screamin in a metal band. its some good stuff. i went to tallahassee with theresa this weekend cause she won 1st in state i believe for writing an apelett court brief. a big congradulations again theresa! it was fun, we checked out FSU and walked a lot and i got to pretend i was her sister the whole time so that was interesting. and im sure you will soon hear sbout theresas strawberry daqurie(sp?) story sooner or later heh :P
im really beginning to appreciate the blood lilies, i just really like our music. i think it is different and thats not a bad thing.

Saturday, March 22nd, 2003

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Time:10:33 pm.
so, you didnt go home last night? yeah, your dad called my house at 1 in the morning looking for you. what did you think you were doing? do you know you are ruining our friendship? not so much by my will but my dad said last night really got him thinking and he isnt gonna let me hang out or talk to you anymore. is that important to you? does that mean anything to you? why do you keep making the same mistakes over and over again? you really had me worried...i had talked to you hours earlier and you asked me if i could make it to the show and i told you no. at the time you were at someone elses house telling me you were gonna head out to the show. then you dad calls and said the last time he talked to you was around 11:30pm...it was now past 1am. i dunno what to do anymore, im really sick of this shit. i have a damn good reason to be upset with you. talking hasnt helped...you've shown me that.

Wednesday, February 26th, 2003

Subject:once again...
Time:10:09 pm.
Mood: sleepy.
just feelin a little depressed

Monday, February 24th, 2003

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Subject:a quicky
Time:10:31 am.
im in school right now, im supposed to be doing research on Faschings fest in german calss but ive been looking for about 45 mins and im not having much luck. i woke up with a sore throught this morning...blah. robyn might be coming over today that would rock since we dont hang out much anymore. gtg. update more later possibly.

Thursday, February 20th, 2003

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Time:12:24 pm.
Mood: melancholy.
this really isnt the best time of the day to update. lots of distractions, like my sis running on the incredably sqeeky tredmill, and my dad is working in the kitchen, tearing up the lenolium to put down tile. anyway, my dad let me stay home today because i had a doctors apointment. so did he...yeah, so that was fun.(sense the sarcasm?) while we were sitting in the room waiting for the doctor to come in, my dad turned to me and said "you need to trash that shirt" and i said "why? is it because its faded?" he as like "no, its your arms, your build, your big boned, you should wear something losser....you look like a truck driver." that right there made me feel uncomfortable and ugly. gee...way to tell me im butch dad. well, he sensed my discomfort by his comment and later in the bronco said, "i was just figuring id let you stay home today." even tho i had only missed 2 classes. then he took me to get wendy's to eat. he does stuff like that...he'll hurt my feelings, unintentionally, then he'll try to suck up to me. oh well, i got a day off from it...
show tomarrow at the tab. we are writing a new song and its totally awsome. i dont think we are playing it tomarrow tho, we arent ready yet to release its awsomeness to the public yet haha! j/p no, actually, we just dont have it down completely. ok..im gona go now...maybe ill update more later.

Thursday, January 16th, 2003

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Subject:yay fo da weekendz!
Time:10:36 pm.
Mood: mellow.
tomarrow im hangin out with gary. he is such an awesome person, he doesnt even know.

i hate school yes i do, i hate school how about you!

chem test tomarrow..i just cant get the concept of it all...to many equations to memorize.

my mom cut my hair today, not too much of a difference just a lil neater looking and shaped i guess. i love spending time with my mom. she helped me with my german homework and we laughed a lot. good times.

Wednesday, January 8th, 2003

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Subject:good times keep on rollin'
Time:9:27 pm.
i went to robyns today. i havent hung out with her in ages so it was a lot of fun. we made this really funny slide show on her computer and watched it 87264585 times, laughing our asses off, litterally. j/k or asses are still there but it was a good time. she helped me get new lj pics. good bye with the old, hello with the new. anyway, ive really been slacking in chemistry, i already totally blew off the first homework assignment:( i cant fail....that would be soo bad, my dad would probably make me quit my band....spreaking of bands, Rachel I. wants to start a band with me. im excited about it. she called me today and told me that they have been working on some stuff and have some ideas already. dont worry kat...we will get our metal/hc band together believe me and it will be so tough. grrrr!!! ok well im off to get a shower.

Friday, January 3rd, 2003

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Subject:...cause your my friend
Time:1:06 am.
Mood: uncomfortable.
i have a reason, believe it or not, for how i acted. im sorry you were upset...i didnt want to add to it, and thats what upset me...is that i was right there..i wanted to help...i didnt want you to resort to that at that moment. i guess i felt a little helpless when you wanted that instead of coming to me.

Monday, December 30th, 2002

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Subject:what is my problem?
Time:10:18 pm.
Mood: moody.
if i could actually say what i feel...i dunno...i dont understand myself and i wish things could be simple. i like ian..i think, but the thought of a commitment, a "title", in other words, scares me...it pushes me away from that person and im left with this feeling inside thats just like...crying. every damn time its like this...its funny because earlier on the phone, theresa was telling me about this quiz she took titled "why am i still single" or something like that and the result was that she is afraid to commit. sounds like thats my problem. this isnt right..if someone is lonely, how could they be afraid to commit too? this is going to bother me until i drive ian away, i know it. already he asked me to put him at "the top of my list". that makes me feel so pressured. we aren't even going out yet.
on a happier note, the sanctuary was a lot of fun. we raved most of the time. i wasnt diggin the booty room to much...just didnt feel comfortable there. thank god for techno tho, heh.

LiveJournal for Haley.

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